I haven't found a good long rant for a long time and I have been negligent to my loyal followers. For this I apologize. I supposed this would be a good starting point for a new analysis on something completely irritating to me. Let's talk about the medical system.
I had an appointment back around June of '10. In this appointment, my doctor basically threw pills at me. By this, I mean since I had my medical records from the previous doctor that I had, he took a long look at what I was on and decided to "test" me with conversation about the medications I was given.
I told him about my ailments and that one in particular is on-going, so that prescription has been going on for a while. The other one happens on a rare occasion. Another one is frequent, but not frequent enough to be abused and the last medication is hit or miss with me.
He offers an alternative to Vicodin. Let me tell you that a bottle of 30 pills of Vicodin lasts me anywhere from 6-12 months or more depending on how bad the knee pain gets in the winter and in the summer. He tells me that Tramadol might work and it has less side effects. I tell him that it's fine as long as when I'm in a lot of pain it takes the edge off. It is now February of '11 and I've got most of the bottle still left, I think I've used it twice.
Now insomnia is something I have and I hate, hate, HATE it. It makes me depressed during the day, unmotivated and unproductive. Ambien helps me out once in a while when the number of hours I've slept are lower than the number of days have passed. Let me tell you, people get HIGH off of Ambien, more than a little. It's also very addictive. The first time I took it (prescribed to me at the hospital), I hallucinated about zombies and worked out a zombie plan in my head!
I was prescribed Ambien without a second thought. I got 5 refills between June and December. During that time, I only refilled once. It expired in December, so I had the pharmacy put in another request. The doctor that saw me is no longer with the clinic, and the head of the clinic denied it because they want to see me at the office.
Fine, I haven't had a check up in 8 months. I'm irritated because I have to go all the way across town, sit in a smelly, ghetto waiting room. I also have to deal with unprofessional front desk staff and long wait times. I seriously debated not getting Ambien and sticking with Tylenol PM, but I figure as long as it's under the supervision of a professional, for the MOST part, I should be fine.
I've thought about going on Chantix, but I don't know that I can seeing as I am also on an anti-depressant. Chantix comes with a nasty possible side-effect of suicidal thoughts, hostility and violence, all things that are not good, for me especially.
I shall update everyone on how it goes in the next couple hours when I have my appointment.
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Friday, July 23, 2010
Office work
I figured if I'm going to find things to bitch about, I'll add work on to my blogs. Originally, I just wanted to pick up a job so that I could pay for the 3 birthday run that we have every summer. My boys and my youngest daughter all have birthdays about 2 weeks apart at the end of July through August.
I was willing to work part-time anywhere and in all reality; I was looking at a supermarket or something. Well, seeing as I spend entirely too much time on the internet, I went looking for work and made the mistake of submitting my resume. The first job I submitted to, responded. I had an assessment which asked that I type at least 45WPM. I thought for sure I was going to tank so I set it in my mind that this job was not for me. I got 66WPM.
I was hired almost immediately but I had to wait a week and a half to start (due to 4th of July three day weekend). The place looks like a mental asylum from the outside. The only way you know anything is at this place when you drive up is the concrete sign that contains 3 building numbers. There are 2 wrought iron gates and a sign that states that this is a private property. No, this isn't creepy at all. When I applied, I wondered what the hell this place did. I thought maybe it was a government job, but obviously it wasn't seeing as government places of work have nifty buildings.
When I interviewed and when I got the job, I had to fill out confidentiality forms. Oddly, I didn't get a copy, I'll have to look at that now that I think about it. I assume this "confidentiality" is all about not disclosing what companies we review and what research is done. I know that a portion of it states that something or other will cause irreparable harm to the company. Somehow I doubt that.
Anyhow, I start working, pretty good pay (which apparently I'm not allowed to disclose either) and the supervisor isn't breathing down my neck, a DEFINITE plus from other jobs I've had. I literally have a three wall cubicle and the ONLY one in this office with a wall in front of me. Everyone else has either window access OR a cubicle with sight of a window. Ok, shit rolls downhill, I can hang with that. It's business "professional" meaning men wear ties and women wear pantyhose. I can hang with that although the way these people dress and skirt the "professional" part is NOT by any means "business professional." Additionally, I can’t hang anything on the blank wall….fuck it, I’ll make my cubicle really obnoxious then.
I decide to pretend that I'm working for a reputable company that cares for its employees (they don't exist when it's corporate). The first thing I look at is how they are about family. A lot of women are pregnant, but as someone pointed out, get a bunch of women within childbearing age together and you have inevitably a baby boom. I ask about "bring your child to work day." The answer I receive is, "Our former president was a lot more strict and conservative, but our new one has kids, you should submit it to the suggestion box."
I have looked into this box and realized that the concerns are addressed in a newsletter that has no rhyme or reason when it comes out. In order to even find it, I have to dig through the shared company files in obscure folders (don't ask). The responses that I've read, across the board are, "we're looking into it." Subsequent newsletters have shown that they have not, in fact "looked into it." This of course is no surprise seeing as this is a company that makes insane amounts of money and therefore doesn't HAVE to care about anything but their bottom line, and OH do they.
There have been suggestions ranging from having healthier foods at lunch (they provide lunch every day) to having tables outside for when the weather's warmer. Some of these things have gone through, some have not. I've heard of people getting sick from the food here, so I am very picky when it comes to what I choose to eat. The "lunchroom" which is NOT its official name, is a creepy building. For those of you that are video game enthusiasts, if you've ever played Resident Evil 4, it looks pretty much like the house at the beginning that you come to. For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, the creepiness factor in this “house converted into a lunchroom” ranks up there with a house after a murder has occurred and it's been cleaned up.
The statements that I've heard about lunch are, "our boss provides us with lunch out of the kindness of their heart. We are grateful and thankful for everything they do." Sounds like a mantra to me. There's a reason that lunch is only 1/2 an hour and provided. Tax write-off, the employees don't have to leave campus to eat lunch (unless they REALLY hate the food), and there's no risk really of the employees breaching that laughably vague confidentiality agreement that I mentioned earlier. Let me insert my opinion and what I know to be true, at least in a corporate job. There is NO kindness of heart. Everything has a bottom line and you are just a stepping stone.
Indoctrination is used in this job and others. You are led through orientation, shown what the company expects from you and how grateful you should be that you work for this place, when in reality it is they who should feel honored that I decided to work for them. You are "instructed" on sexual harassment, what it means and how to "avoid" it, although apparently nowadays breathing in someone's general direction is sexually intimidating. Another laughable instruction is that of "diversity training." In the last video I saw, there's a pregnant woman talking to a coworker in the break area. She tells her coworker how tired she is of being pregnant and how hard it is to be so big. There is a lone coworker sitting in the table adjacent to them. The pregnant lady looks at the other coworker as she speaks about being big, raising her eyebrows in a move that I would interpret as attempting to include him in the conversation.
The video begs to differ. It states that because of such an insensitive remark and the fact that she looked at him when she said it, the employee will be distracted all day wondering why she looked at him (he's tubby). This will cause a decrease in productivity. Again, it's not about the guy's feelings....it's about the bottom line. Don't get me wrong, I'm opposed to racism and prejudice. However, I'm also opposed to the cry baby society we've nurtured. "Wahh someone looked at me when they said 'big'!!" Yeah, if you put down the Twinkie, you wouldn't have that issue.
"Waahhhhh someone complimented my hair/nails/perfume/etc. I feel sexually harassed!" Get off of it. You're probably fat and/or unattractive and DEFINITELY have no sort of self-esteem and have to call "sexual" attention to yourself so that you and others believe that you are desired by the perverts. Before I get the hate mail, let me clarify that actual sexual harassment is an awful situation; I've experienced myself and in one job, asked to "sweep it under the carpet." However, every single implication nowadays cheapens the legitimate claims.
Here's where it gets interesting. I sat through a very important meeting with the heart of the decision makers. There were about 10-12 people in the room at the time. Someone (one of the decision makers) commented on the metric system. Someone else responded that it would never work because the Southern States are not smart enough. There's a time and place for comments like this because, let's face it, they WILL be made. During a meeting where decisions are being made is NOT that time. In the same meeting, as these people make decisions to approve or deny medical research ethics, the head of the meeting was on face book!!!! *I* would get fired for being on face book and I get paid a whole HELL of a lot less than this doctor who is vested in making decisions for the medical field and it's ok?!?!
It doesn't end there, the same day, a nice woman, I say nice because you can tell when people are nice and just suffer from "foot in mouth" syndrome, was the person taking me and guiding me through the meeting. She spoke of multiple children and how it was the "Latin way." This, after she knew I was Latin. I had a good chuckle. I'm not offended; I'm not going to go to HR or my supervisor or even hers to complain. But it goes to show that companies are hypocritical. Earlier today, I was told by my supervisor who thus far had been just fine and dandy by leaving me alone, that I was not allowed to eat at my desk (I was having a rice cake lol). There is one particularly obnoxious person (we all know a couple) who complains loudly and often about her aches, ills and pains. She speaks very loudly about how hungry she is and hits up one of the other ladies who apparently is a vending machine. The supervisor has said nothing in the time I've been here. Not more than an HOUR after I was informed of the "no-eating-at-your-desk" policy, a woman 3 cubicles down was making the "movie theatre rustle" with her bag. The obnoxious one asked if she was eating Honey Nut Cheerios and the other woman responded that she was. It was a loud conversation. The supervisor said nothing. My next cubicle neighbor is currently munching away on something or other and does constantly...still nothing.
The security systems that are in place are also hilarious. For the first two weeks that I worked here, I did not know my ID card was also a passkey. The main building has an entrance into the offices. I didn't know I needed a passkey for that entire time. I finally informed someone and the problem was fixed. Let me state that I have not had a background check done and no drug testing (although it would be moot, I don't do drugs). Great security for a company that makes you sign a confidentiality agreement just for visiting huh?
Let's talk about the place itself and the employees. Everyone walks around as if they themselves are lunatics. Yes they are. They're cubicle zombies. There are some that sit on desk chairs, others that sit on exercise balls. Some use them because they're much more comfortable than sitting on an office chair. Others claim that they are "injured," "in pain," etc. The office requires a medical note stating that the ball is a medical necessity. WHY? This is retarded. There are a couple of women (ok, more than a couple) who complain about back pain, hip pain, knee pain, leg pain, the list goes on. Someone just today stated that it was too "cold" in the office and we should turn up the heat. NO! Heat breeds illness and these nasty bitches don't even wash their hands! In the same vein, pantyhose are demanded to be worn. I can only IMAGINE the nasty crotch cooties these chicks have going on. I’ll be getting a medical exemption for that (the pantyhose, not the crotch cooties).
She said that the "cold" was hurting her hips through her feet, agonizing pain because she got in a nasty car accident. I sympathize with those that are injured, I really do. However, she was busy yakking away at her cubicle friend 4 cubicles down and when her phone started ringing, she stampeded toward it. Where's the pain? Another one walked by and said she was freezing and that she sleeps with a fan and A/C on her. She said she was in so much pain it hurt to come to work. Both of these women are...."less-than-skinny" and by that, I mean fat. I'm not even close to kidding. They walk and the floor shakes, my monitors jiggle and my water does the Jurassic Park movement. The obnoxious one has a slew of health issues apparently and the need to rescue animals and try to pawn them off to co-workers. She's also very pushy when it comes to matters of social networking. I made a fake account to add my coworkers to, SIMPLY so that she'd get off my back. Srsly? Who adds co-workers that you don't know AND your supervisor to a social network? As if bitches don't backstab enough!
The obnoxious one, the “less-than-skinny” one (it should be noted if it wasn’t before, that the obnoxious one is tubby too….a lot) and the overachieving sole male on our team are permanently attached to the supervisor. They walk over to the desk where she sits (RIGHT next to my cubicle) and make lame jokes, tell her about a recent call, talk to her about personal problems and I hear all of this. The supervisor responds in the standard, sterile manager response. “Oh really?” *chuckle* These people remind me of the little dogs I mentioned in my previous blog. They do things to impress others, in this case, their supervisor and then run back to get a pat on the head and a scratch on the belly. Have some integrity will ya? I think my work quality should speak for itself. I’m not here to make friends; I’m here for my paycheck. I don’t HAVE to like you, but I do have to be courteous and work with you.
I've found the loopholes though. Every time a rule isn't upheld across the board, I'll slack a little more. I am the QUEEN of loopholes, medical excuses and bellyaching. I leave jobs on MY terms and I get away with anything I want to get away with. My next blog I will dedicate to showing you some loopholes and tips on how to slack and get away with it. If you want specific tips or have specific questions, leave them in the comments and tell your friends to follow my blog!! Until next time!
P.S. just got paid for 3 hours of typing this blog and pretending to study up on the job. SCORE!
I was willing to work part-time anywhere and in all reality; I was looking at a supermarket or something. Well, seeing as I spend entirely too much time on the internet, I went looking for work and made the mistake of submitting my resume. The first job I submitted to, responded. I had an assessment which asked that I type at least 45WPM. I thought for sure I was going to tank so I set it in my mind that this job was not for me. I got 66WPM.
I was hired almost immediately but I had to wait a week and a half to start (due to 4th of July three day weekend). The place looks like a mental asylum from the outside. The only way you know anything is at this place when you drive up is the concrete sign that contains 3 building numbers. There are 2 wrought iron gates and a sign that states that this is a private property. No, this isn't creepy at all. When I applied, I wondered what the hell this place did. I thought maybe it was a government job, but obviously it wasn't seeing as government places of work have nifty buildings.
When I interviewed and when I got the job, I had to fill out confidentiality forms. Oddly, I didn't get a copy, I'll have to look at that now that I think about it. I assume this "confidentiality" is all about not disclosing what companies we review and what research is done. I know that a portion of it states that something or other will cause irreparable harm to the company. Somehow I doubt that.
Anyhow, I start working, pretty good pay (which apparently I'm not allowed to disclose either) and the supervisor isn't breathing down my neck, a DEFINITE plus from other jobs I've had. I literally have a three wall cubicle and the ONLY one in this office with a wall in front of me. Everyone else has either window access OR a cubicle with sight of a window. Ok, shit rolls downhill, I can hang with that. It's business "professional" meaning men wear ties and women wear pantyhose. I can hang with that although the way these people dress and skirt the "professional" part is NOT by any means "business professional." Additionally, I can’t hang anything on the blank wall….fuck it, I’ll make my cubicle really obnoxious then.
I decide to pretend that I'm working for a reputable company that cares for its employees (they don't exist when it's corporate). The first thing I look at is how they are about family. A lot of women are pregnant, but as someone pointed out, get a bunch of women within childbearing age together and you have inevitably a baby boom. I ask about "bring your child to work day." The answer I receive is, "Our former president was a lot more strict and conservative, but our new one has kids, you should submit it to the suggestion box."
I have looked into this box and realized that the concerns are addressed in a newsletter that has no rhyme or reason when it comes out. In order to even find it, I have to dig through the shared company files in obscure folders (don't ask). The responses that I've read, across the board are, "we're looking into it." Subsequent newsletters have shown that they have not, in fact "looked into it." This of course is no surprise seeing as this is a company that makes insane amounts of money and therefore doesn't HAVE to care about anything but their bottom line, and OH do they.
There have been suggestions ranging from having healthier foods at lunch (they provide lunch every day) to having tables outside for when the weather's warmer. Some of these things have gone through, some have not. I've heard of people getting sick from the food here, so I am very picky when it comes to what I choose to eat. The "lunchroom" which is NOT its official name, is a creepy building. For those of you that are video game enthusiasts, if you've ever played Resident Evil 4, it looks pretty much like the house at the beginning that you come to. For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, the creepiness factor in this “house converted into a lunchroom” ranks up there with a house after a murder has occurred and it's been cleaned up.
The statements that I've heard about lunch are, "our boss provides us with lunch out of the kindness of their heart. We are grateful and thankful for everything they do." Sounds like a mantra to me. There's a reason that lunch is only 1/2 an hour and provided. Tax write-off, the employees don't have to leave campus to eat lunch (unless they REALLY hate the food), and there's no risk really of the employees breaching that laughably vague confidentiality agreement that I mentioned earlier. Let me insert my opinion and what I know to be true, at least in a corporate job. There is NO kindness of heart. Everything has a bottom line and you are just a stepping stone.
Indoctrination is used in this job and others. You are led through orientation, shown what the company expects from you and how grateful you should be that you work for this place, when in reality it is they who should feel honored that I decided to work for them. You are "instructed" on sexual harassment, what it means and how to "avoid" it, although apparently nowadays breathing in someone's general direction is sexually intimidating. Another laughable instruction is that of "diversity training." In the last video I saw, there's a pregnant woman talking to a coworker in the break area. She tells her coworker how tired she is of being pregnant and how hard it is to be so big. There is a lone coworker sitting in the table adjacent to them. The pregnant lady looks at the other coworker as she speaks about being big, raising her eyebrows in a move that I would interpret as attempting to include him in the conversation.
The video begs to differ. It states that because of such an insensitive remark and the fact that she looked at him when she said it, the employee will be distracted all day wondering why she looked at him (he's tubby). This will cause a decrease in productivity. Again, it's not about the guy's feelings....it's about the bottom line. Don't get me wrong, I'm opposed to racism and prejudice. However, I'm also opposed to the cry baby society we've nurtured. "Wahh someone looked at me when they said 'big'!!" Yeah, if you put down the Twinkie, you wouldn't have that issue.
"Waahhhhh someone complimented my hair/nails/perfume/etc. I feel sexually harassed!" Get off of it. You're probably fat and/or unattractive and DEFINITELY have no sort of self-esteem and have to call "sexual" attention to yourself so that you and others believe that you are desired by the perverts. Before I get the hate mail, let me clarify that actual sexual harassment is an awful situation; I've experienced myself and in one job, asked to "sweep it under the carpet." However, every single implication nowadays cheapens the legitimate claims.
Here's where it gets interesting. I sat through a very important meeting with the heart of the decision makers. There were about 10-12 people in the room at the time. Someone (one of the decision makers) commented on the metric system. Someone else responded that it would never work because the Southern States are not smart enough. There's a time and place for comments like this because, let's face it, they WILL be made. During a meeting where decisions are being made is NOT that time. In the same meeting, as these people make decisions to approve or deny medical research ethics, the head of the meeting was on face book!!!! *I* would get fired for being on face book and I get paid a whole HELL of a lot less than this doctor who is vested in making decisions for the medical field and it's ok?!?!
It doesn't end there, the same day, a nice woman, I say nice because you can tell when people are nice and just suffer from "foot in mouth" syndrome, was the person taking me and guiding me through the meeting. She spoke of multiple children and how it was the "Latin way." This, after she knew I was Latin. I had a good chuckle. I'm not offended; I'm not going to go to HR or my supervisor or even hers to complain. But it goes to show that companies are hypocritical. Earlier today, I was told by my supervisor who thus far had been just fine and dandy by leaving me alone, that I was not allowed to eat at my desk (I was having a rice cake lol). There is one particularly obnoxious person (we all know a couple) who complains loudly and often about her aches, ills and pains. She speaks very loudly about how hungry she is and hits up one of the other ladies who apparently is a vending machine. The supervisor has said nothing in the time I've been here. Not more than an HOUR after I was informed of the "no-eating-at-your-desk" policy, a woman 3 cubicles down was making the "movie theatre rustle" with her bag. The obnoxious one asked if she was eating Honey Nut Cheerios and the other woman responded that she was. It was a loud conversation. The supervisor said nothing. My next cubicle neighbor is currently munching away on something or other and does constantly...still nothing.
The security systems that are in place are also hilarious. For the first two weeks that I worked here, I did not know my ID card was also a passkey. The main building has an entrance into the offices. I didn't know I needed a passkey for that entire time. I finally informed someone and the problem was fixed. Let me state that I have not had a background check done and no drug testing (although it would be moot, I don't do drugs). Great security for a company that makes you sign a confidentiality agreement just for visiting huh?
Let's talk about the place itself and the employees. Everyone walks around as if they themselves are lunatics. Yes they are. They're cubicle zombies. There are some that sit on desk chairs, others that sit on exercise balls. Some use them because they're much more comfortable than sitting on an office chair. Others claim that they are "injured," "in pain," etc. The office requires a medical note stating that the ball is a medical necessity. WHY? This is retarded. There are a couple of women (ok, more than a couple) who complain about back pain, hip pain, knee pain, leg pain, the list goes on. Someone just today stated that it was too "cold" in the office and we should turn up the heat. NO! Heat breeds illness and these nasty bitches don't even wash their hands! In the same vein, pantyhose are demanded to be worn. I can only IMAGINE the nasty crotch cooties these chicks have going on. I’ll be getting a medical exemption for that (the pantyhose, not the crotch cooties).
She said that the "cold" was hurting her hips through her feet, agonizing pain because she got in a nasty car accident. I sympathize with those that are injured, I really do. However, she was busy yakking away at her cubicle friend 4 cubicles down and when her phone started ringing, she stampeded toward it. Where's the pain? Another one walked by and said she was freezing and that she sleeps with a fan and A/C on her. She said she was in so much pain it hurt to come to work. Both of these women are...."less-than-skinny" and by that, I mean fat. I'm not even close to kidding. They walk and the floor shakes, my monitors jiggle and my water does the Jurassic Park movement. The obnoxious one has a slew of health issues apparently and the need to rescue animals and try to pawn them off to co-workers. She's also very pushy when it comes to matters of social networking. I made a fake account to add my coworkers to, SIMPLY so that she'd get off my back. Srsly? Who adds co-workers that you don't know AND your supervisor to a social network? As if bitches don't backstab enough!
The obnoxious one, the “less-than-skinny” one (it should be noted if it wasn’t before, that the obnoxious one is tubby too….a lot) and the overachieving sole male on our team are permanently attached to the supervisor. They walk over to the desk where she sits (RIGHT next to my cubicle) and make lame jokes, tell her about a recent call, talk to her about personal problems and I hear all of this. The supervisor responds in the standard, sterile manager response. “Oh really?” *chuckle* These people remind me of the little dogs I mentioned in my previous blog. They do things to impress others, in this case, their supervisor and then run back to get a pat on the head and a scratch on the belly. Have some integrity will ya? I think my work quality should speak for itself. I’m not here to make friends; I’m here for my paycheck. I don’t HAVE to like you, but I do have to be courteous and work with you.
I've found the loopholes though. Every time a rule isn't upheld across the board, I'll slack a little more. I am the QUEEN of loopholes, medical excuses and bellyaching. I leave jobs on MY terms and I get away with anything I want to get away with. My next blog I will dedicate to showing you some loopholes and tips on how to slack and get away with it. If you want specific tips or have specific questions, leave them in the comments and tell your friends to follow my blog!! Until next time!
P.S. just got paid for 3 hours of typing this blog and pretending to study up on the job. SCORE!
Saturday, July 10, 2010
I figure I'd start it up...
There have been too many articles, comments, posts and such that I have read without dwelling too entirely much into them. One of these particular sites is sometimes so utterly ridiculous that I can't get angry, I have to laugh.
A hot button topic in the parenting world is circumcision. A piece of skin has become the cause célèbre of many a mother and even a few fathers thrown in for good measure. One camp holds the view that circumcision is a necessity. The reasoning of this particular camp is backed by studies that circumcision reduces the risk of penile cancer, UTIs, infection, phimosis, etc.
The other camp holds the view that circumcision is in fact, "mutilation," "genital mutilation," and some have gone as far as calling it child abuse. There was a particular post I read, submitted by a woman who stated that if one chooses to circumcise your son, it's better to abort him. This woman clearly needs mental help.
There does exist a third camp. This camp is made up of women who live their lives everyday loving their children just as much as other women do, regardless of their agendas, points of view, etc. These women couldn't care less about anyone else's foreskin outside of their sons' and perhaps their husbands. These women don't have time to attack other women for their choices in parenting. These women don't care what you feed your infant as long as you feed your infant.
The human need to compete and excel against each other thrives more than ever before on the internet. Specifically it's found its home in the social networks and forums within the world wide web. What once was praise and admiration that was gained by friends who had children and maybe even a parent if they got lucky, has turned into the need of acceptance and praise of multitudes of other women who have children or otherwise a very creepy, unhealthy obsession with baby foreskins.
The women who are anti-circumcision are not all this insane you see. There are those women who prefer not to have their own sons cut, but they do not find the need to post their disgust, scorn and judgmental vitriol on a public forum. I find that a lot of these judgmental women are first-time mothers. This is somewhat of a surprise and an insult.
I blame Rikki Lake and Dr. Sears. Rikki Lake is responsible for a piece of propaganda titled, "The Business of Being Born." I watched this documentary because I wanted to see what the buzz was about. I found it to be filled with information, some questionable, some reasonable. However, the issue I had with this film was the fact that Ms. Lake used emotions, children, childbirth, scare tactics and rapid-fire "statistics" to convince those that witness this spectacle that hospitals are evil and doctors are the boogeymen out to harm poor women and unborn babies.
People forget apparently that Rikki Lake had a talk show back in the 90s that was just about as bad as Jerry Springer.
Watching "The Business of Being Born" though, seems to grant those that quote it, a PhD in all things regarding birthing, parenting and apparently knowledge of the world in general. It also seems to entitle those viewers with the right to judge, insult and accuse parents who do not practice "natural child birth" (as opposed to unnatural childbirth?), breastfeeding, circumcision, co-sleeping, and at times, cloth diapering. Mind you the film only talks about child birth and how hospitals and doctors will try to get women in and out of the hospital bed to make a buck. Doctors will do c-sections because they want to go home and don't want to wait around to deliver these babies (funny, with two of my births, my doctor was at home when I was in labor and was called in when I was ready to push, from home she instructed the nurses and everyone did great!).
Ina May Gaskin is the messiah of childbirth without intervention. She's well educated and has an honorary PhD. She belongs to what some would call a cult. "The Farm" is a commune that has existed since the 60's. Her husband, Stephen Gaskin founded this commune. There are of course, those who have had less than pleasant experiences with "The Farm" as expressed on this webpage;
Second Sight Research
Ms. Gaskin is someone that is at the forefront of "natural child birth." She is a well-intentioned midwife who inspires those women who want to take their child birth to a "spiritual" level in their own way. The commune's rules circle around non-violence. Why then, do the followers, believers and readers of these books, doctrine and movement feel the need to judge everyone who does not have the same point of view? Granted, not all of the followers of this movement are judgmental and bitter.
Circumcision has been called "child abuse" repeatedly. New mothers are immediately swarmed with propaganda about circumcision, epidurals, c-sections, breastfeeding and co-sleeping (I'm sure there's more I'm forgetting). These new mothers are led to believe that if they don't dedicate 100% of their time to doing all of these things for their child, then they are BAD mothers. Is it any wonder why some women suffer from Post Partum Depression?
Formula is a great alternative to breast milk. I have breastfed all of my children, but I did supplement both my boys for a few days as I got the hang of breastfeeding with my first son and then to heal from cracked nipples with my second son. I wouldn't hesitate to give any of my children formula if necessary. I don't judge those mothers that choose to formula feed their children because I don't know their situations and most importantly, it's NONE of my business.
I see comments from women and have been at the receiving end of some of these comments, judging me for choosing to have my sons circumcised. One of the women that decided she would judge me for circumcising my sons and any future sons has her own little girls' ears pierced, yet she also believes in "His body, his decision, not yours." What about those little girls' decisions to have their ears pierced? I would like to mention that my daughters' ears are pierced as well.
The negative comments, insults and accusations seem to be coming from the same general demographic. I am not saying all women who hold these beliefs are from this demographic, nor am I saying all women from this demographic hold these beliefs. They seem to be the stay at home moms, Christian, many of them first time mothers. Then you have the random males joining anti-circumcision debates, breastfeeding debates, etc. That's fine and dandy but ask yourself the motivations of some of these people?
All I'm seeing is judging, mean people. I wanted a natural birth with my first son. I didn't get that natural birth because he was 8 days overdue, the placenta was maturing and my amniotic fluid was low. The doctor asked me if I wanted to be induced, I told her yes, if it was her professional opinion that I should be and we did it. I was given pitocin, went through agonizing labor and finally begged for an epidural. The staff was refusing to give it to me and I was even told to be quiet because I was scaring other mothers on the floor. When I was given the epidural, things changed fast. I was happy, I could enjoy my labor and when I had my son, though the epidural had been turned off so I could push, I felt great relief and it was the first happiest day of my entire life. I don't mourn the fact that I didn't have a natural birth, I don't feel traumatized by my birth experience. Things happened, they had to be taken care of in a certain manner and they were.
There are a lot of women who HAVE had unnecessary c-sections, traumatizing birth experiences and careless doctors and my heart goes out to them. However, those women who believe they know more than every doctor period need a reality check. All doctors don't sit around and plan how to harm pregnant women and their babies. They went to school for this and you'd best believe that unless you're a doctor yourself, you're not going to know more than all of them, period.
I personally chose all my inductions (2 of them medically necessary) and I don't regret any of them. I made the best choice for myself and my children, all of whom are healthy, thriving, beautiful and intelligent. None of them cry to me asking me, "Mommy, why did you circumcise us? You took our choice!" or "Mommy, why did you have us induced? We were so comfortable!" Same goes for women who choose to have cesarean sections. Those of you that have, please let me know in comments if your kids have questioned you as to why you had a c-section and if you ruined their lives in the process, thank you in advance! I would like to add that both my sons had this to say when I read to them the circumcision debate, "They need to ease up off our junk and worry about more important things in the world."
I mentioned the demographics that I observed of these judgmental women above. I failed to mention those women in horrible marriages or relationships. A lot of them have lost all sense of themselves and seek to identify with something, anything that will give them a sense of control. Parenting is the ticket. These husbands neglect, sometimes abuse (in any form) or abandon these women. Their anger and frustration can not be directed to these men for fear that if they stand up for themselves it will be over. This is called co-dependency. It also means that these mothers grow so very attached to their children because they feel abandoned by their significant others and the emotional ties need to go somewhere. These children are said to be smothered.
I don't have a problem with attachment parenting. As a matter of fact, I co-sleep, breastfeed on demand, baby wear and refuse to let my kids CIO (cry it out). What I have a problem with is those judgmental people (at the risk of sounding redundant) that feel the need to judge other moms like myself who don't feel the need to smother our children and dictate that parenting can only be done in ONE way. These women call all the rest of us "sheep" and yet they seek labels, groups and peers to define themselves and be rewarded.
I posted someone's statement in a social networking site which was a woman who saw a delivery of formula to a neighbor and she planned on throwing it out. Instead, she left a note on the woman's door that stated that breastfeeding was best. Why would she do that? Does she know if the woman medically can not breastfeed? Does she know if the woman didn't adopt? More importantly, was it any of her business or right to step on someone else's private property to provide them with unsolicited advice for her own political agenda and so she could run home to the social networking site and type as fast as her fingers could her deed for the day? She thinks so, and she got the pat on the back and the treat she was longing for from her peers, perhaps because her husband plays video games all day, is a workaholic or simply stands his ground on his own beliefs and that doesn't sit well with her.
Another woman (not so oddly enough on the same site) stated that if women were going to have their boys circumcised, it was better that they aborted them. This was just a disgusting statement that none of the "gaggle" seemed to have a problem with. The hypocrisy is thick as well. Another woman posted that she felt "attacked" by those that don't like NIP (nursing in public) and the responses basically told her that she shouldn't feel bad, it's her choice how she feeds her child, and no one should judge her. Speaking out of both sides of your mouth, eh? I find it silly and very amusing that all of these "groups" and their self proclaimed "causes" keep me entertained for hours. After all, this blog would probably not have existed had it not been for them.
To all of you ladies out there who think you're a better parent than the rest of us for the above reasons, thank you! This stuff writes itself.
To all of you ladies who are taking it one day at a time, making the best choice for YOUR children regardless of what it is, I raise my glass to you!
Until next time, same bat time, same bat site!
A hot button topic in the parenting world is circumcision. A piece of skin has become the cause célèbre of many a mother and even a few fathers thrown in for good measure. One camp holds the view that circumcision is a necessity. The reasoning of this particular camp is backed by studies that circumcision reduces the risk of penile cancer, UTIs, infection, phimosis, etc.
The other camp holds the view that circumcision is in fact, "mutilation," "genital mutilation," and some have gone as far as calling it child abuse. There was a particular post I read, submitted by a woman who stated that if one chooses to circumcise your son, it's better to abort him. This woman clearly needs mental help.
There does exist a third camp. This camp is made up of women who live their lives everyday loving their children just as much as other women do, regardless of their agendas, points of view, etc. These women couldn't care less about anyone else's foreskin outside of their sons' and perhaps their husbands. These women don't have time to attack other women for their choices in parenting. These women don't care what you feed your infant as long as you feed your infant.
The human need to compete and excel against each other thrives more than ever before on the internet. Specifically it's found its home in the social networks and forums within the world wide web. What once was praise and admiration that was gained by friends who had children and maybe even a parent if they got lucky, has turned into the need of acceptance and praise of multitudes of other women who have children or otherwise a very creepy, unhealthy obsession with baby foreskins.
The women who are anti-circumcision are not all this insane you see. There are those women who prefer not to have their own sons cut, but they do not find the need to post their disgust, scorn and judgmental vitriol on a public forum. I find that a lot of these judgmental women are first-time mothers. This is somewhat of a surprise and an insult.
I blame Rikki Lake and Dr. Sears. Rikki Lake is responsible for a piece of propaganda titled, "The Business of Being Born." I watched this documentary because I wanted to see what the buzz was about. I found it to be filled with information, some questionable, some reasonable. However, the issue I had with this film was the fact that Ms. Lake used emotions, children, childbirth, scare tactics and rapid-fire "statistics" to convince those that witness this spectacle that hospitals are evil and doctors are the boogeymen out to harm poor women and unborn babies.
People forget apparently that Rikki Lake had a talk show back in the 90s that was just about as bad as Jerry Springer.
Watching "The Business of Being Born" though, seems to grant those that quote it, a PhD in all things regarding birthing, parenting and apparently knowledge of the world in general. It also seems to entitle those viewers with the right to judge, insult and accuse parents who do not practice "natural child birth" (as opposed to unnatural childbirth?), breastfeeding, circumcision, co-sleeping, and at times, cloth diapering. Mind you the film only talks about child birth and how hospitals and doctors will try to get women in and out of the hospital bed to make a buck. Doctors will do c-sections because they want to go home and don't want to wait around to deliver these babies (funny, with two of my births, my doctor was at home when I was in labor and was called in when I was ready to push, from home she instructed the nurses and everyone did great!).
Ina May Gaskin is the messiah of childbirth without intervention. She's well educated and has an honorary PhD. She belongs to what some would call a cult. "The Farm" is a commune that has existed since the 60's. Her husband, Stephen Gaskin founded this commune. There are of course, those who have had less than pleasant experiences with "The Farm" as expressed on this webpage;
Second Sight Research
Ms. Gaskin is someone that is at the forefront of "natural child birth." She is a well-intentioned midwife who inspires those women who want to take their child birth to a "spiritual" level in their own way. The commune's rules circle around non-violence. Why then, do the followers, believers and readers of these books, doctrine and movement feel the need to judge everyone who does not have the same point of view? Granted, not all of the followers of this movement are judgmental and bitter.
Circumcision has been called "child abuse" repeatedly. New mothers are immediately swarmed with propaganda about circumcision, epidurals, c-sections, breastfeeding and co-sleeping (I'm sure there's more I'm forgetting). These new mothers are led to believe that if they don't dedicate 100% of their time to doing all of these things for their child, then they are BAD mothers. Is it any wonder why some women suffer from Post Partum Depression?
Formula is a great alternative to breast milk. I have breastfed all of my children, but I did supplement both my boys for a few days as I got the hang of breastfeeding with my first son and then to heal from cracked nipples with my second son. I wouldn't hesitate to give any of my children formula if necessary. I don't judge those mothers that choose to formula feed their children because I don't know their situations and most importantly, it's NONE of my business.
I see comments from women and have been at the receiving end of some of these comments, judging me for choosing to have my sons circumcised. One of the women that decided she would judge me for circumcising my sons and any future sons has her own little girls' ears pierced, yet she also believes in "His body, his decision, not yours." What about those little girls' decisions to have their ears pierced? I would like to mention that my daughters' ears are pierced as well.
The negative comments, insults and accusations seem to be coming from the same general demographic. I am not saying all women who hold these beliefs are from this demographic, nor am I saying all women from this demographic hold these beliefs. They seem to be the stay at home moms, Christian, many of them first time mothers. Then you have the random males joining anti-circumcision debates, breastfeeding debates, etc. That's fine and dandy but ask yourself the motivations of some of these people?
All I'm seeing is judging, mean people. I wanted a natural birth with my first son. I didn't get that natural birth because he was 8 days overdue, the placenta was maturing and my amniotic fluid was low. The doctor asked me if I wanted to be induced, I told her yes, if it was her professional opinion that I should be and we did it. I was given pitocin, went through agonizing labor and finally begged for an epidural. The staff was refusing to give it to me and I was even told to be quiet because I was scaring other mothers on the floor. When I was given the epidural, things changed fast. I was happy, I could enjoy my labor and when I had my son, though the epidural had been turned off so I could push, I felt great relief and it was the first happiest day of my entire life. I don't mourn the fact that I didn't have a natural birth, I don't feel traumatized by my birth experience. Things happened, they had to be taken care of in a certain manner and they were.
There are a lot of women who HAVE had unnecessary c-sections, traumatizing birth experiences and careless doctors and my heart goes out to them. However, those women who believe they know more than every doctor period need a reality check. All doctors don't sit around and plan how to harm pregnant women and their babies. They went to school for this and you'd best believe that unless you're a doctor yourself, you're not going to know more than all of them, period.
I personally chose all my inductions (2 of them medically necessary) and I don't regret any of them. I made the best choice for myself and my children, all of whom are healthy, thriving, beautiful and intelligent. None of them cry to me asking me, "Mommy, why did you circumcise us? You took our choice!" or "Mommy, why did you have us induced? We were so comfortable!" Same goes for women who choose to have cesarean sections. Those of you that have, please let me know in comments if your kids have questioned you as to why you had a c-section and if you ruined their lives in the process, thank you in advance! I would like to add that both my sons had this to say when I read to them the circumcision debate, "They need to ease up off our junk and worry about more important things in the world."
I mentioned the demographics that I observed of these judgmental women above. I failed to mention those women in horrible marriages or relationships. A lot of them have lost all sense of themselves and seek to identify with something, anything that will give them a sense of control. Parenting is the ticket. These husbands neglect, sometimes abuse (in any form) or abandon these women. Their anger and frustration can not be directed to these men for fear that if they stand up for themselves it will be over. This is called co-dependency. It also means that these mothers grow so very attached to their children because they feel abandoned by their significant others and the emotional ties need to go somewhere. These children are said to be smothered.
I don't have a problem with attachment parenting. As a matter of fact, I co-sleep, breastfeed on demand, baby wear and refuse to let my kids CIO (cry it out). What I have a problem with is those judgmental people (at the risk of sounding redundant) that feel the need to judge other moms like myself who don't feel the need to smother our children and dictate that parenting can only be done in ONE way. These women call all the rest of us "sheep" and yet they seek labels, groups and peers to define themselves and be rewarded.
I posted someone's statement in a social networking site which was a woman who saw a delivery of formula to a neighbor and she planned on throwing it out. Instead, she left a note on the woman's door that stated that breastfeeding was best. Why would she do that? Does she know if the woman medically can not breastfeed? Does she know if the woman didn't adopt? More importantly, was it any of her business or right to step on someone else's private property to provide them with unsolicited advice for her own political agenda and so she could run home to the social networking site and type as fast as her fingers could her deed for the day? She thinks so, and she got the pat on the back and the treat she was longing for from her peers, perhaps because her husband plays video games all day, is a workaholic or simply stands his ground on his own beliefs and that doesn't sit well with her.
Another woman (not so oddly enough on the same site) stated that if women were going to have their boys circumcised, it was better that they aborted them. This was just a disgusting statement that none of the "gaggle" seemed to have a problem with. The hypocrisy is thick as well. Another woman posted that she felt "attacked" by those that don't like NIP (nursing in public) and the responses basically told her that she shouldn't feel bad, it's her choice how she feeds her child, and no one should judge her. Speaking out of both sides of your mouth, eh? I find it silly and very amusing that all of these "groups" and their self proclaimed "causes" keep me entertained for hours. After all, this blog would probably not have existed had it not been for them.
To all of you ladies out there who think you're a better parent than the rest of us for the above reasons, thank you! This stuff writes itself.
To all of you ladies who are taking it one day at a time, making the best choice for YOUR children regardless of what it is, I raise my glass to you!
Until next time, same bat time, same bat site!
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